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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Y’all have probably read one of my threads about my nephews wife going back to work and me keeping the 3 and 4 year old one day a week so that she can go to the office . It’s a 10 hour day . I thought it was only going to be for a week or two , but it’s been about 2 months now . I hadn’t been sick in over 8 years before I started watching them and since I have been sick twice in one month . I am still getting over the last cold . They were on vacation last week and as soon as they get back my nephew and the girl get sick . They are supposed to be better now . My nephews wife just called me and wants me to keep them again Monday . I am expecting a delivery sometime now to one day next week and I want to be here . I feel like a bad guy if I say no , I know they need the money . I don’t mind keeping them some , but I don’t want it to be my job . Am I a bad person ? I feel like a bad person if I say no . Her mom also keeps them one day a week , but she said that she couldn’t do it Monday .
 

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Your a human Marshall. All humans feel like that.

It is ok to say no...I have learned this from my wife. It is ok to set some parameters and lay some ground rules.

Helping is helping but inadvertently being used is being used even by your family.

Go pray about it alone quiet still on your knees humble. Ask God what to do, how to do it and when. Ask Him to give you... the courage and the peace to do it.

Ask God to prepare their hearts and understanding for the conversation and to give you and them a peace about it.

Sit down with both of them.....tell them how much you love them and tell them...... exactly what you just told us.
 

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Y’all have probably read one of my threads about my nephews wife going back to work and me keeping the 3 and 4 year old one day a week so that she can go to the office . It’s a 10 hour day . I thought it was only going to be for a week or two , but it’s been about 2 months now . I hadn’t been sick in over 8 years before I started watching them and since I have been sick twice in one month . I am still getting over the last cold . They were on vacation last week and as soon as they get back my nephew and the girl get sick . They are supposed to be better now . My nephews wife just called me and wants me to keep them again Monday . I am expecting a delivery sometime now to one day next week and I want to be here . I feel like a bad guy if I say no , I know they need the money . I don’t mind keeping them some , but I don’t want it to be my job . Am I a bad person ? I feel like a bad person if I say no . Her mom also keeps them one day a week , but she said that she couldn’t do it Monday .
Marshall- you need to say NO when you have commitments and things to do. Say no without GUILT! Are you feeling they are taking advantage of you? Taking care of young children can be very trying at times. Just saying, JMHO
 

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I don’t feel like they are taking advantage of me , it’s just I don’t want to be obligated to it when I have something to do , or if a illness is running through their house .
I feel you will explain it to them and they will understand. Good luck! This day and age it takes 2 incomes to get by. Just saying. JMHO
 

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Y’all have probably read one of my threads about my nephews wife going back to work and me keeping the 3 and 4 year old one day a week so that she can go to the office . It’s a 10 hour day . I thought it was only going to be for a week or two , but it’s been about 2 months now . I hadn’t been sick in over 8 years before I started watching them and since I have been sick twice in one month . I am still getting over the last cold . They were on vacation last week and as soon as they get back my nephew and the girl get sick . They are supposed to be better now . My nephews wife just called me and wants me to keep them again Monday . I am expecting a delivery sometime now to one day next week and I want to be here . I feel like a bad guy if I say no , I know they need the money . I don’t mind keeping them some , but I don’t want it to be my job . Am I a bad person ? I feel like a bad person if I say no . Her mom also keeps them one day a week , but she said that she couldn’t do it Monday .
No, Marshall, you are not a bad guy. In fact, I am quite impressed with your stamina to be able to keep up with a three and four-year-old for 10 hours a day. Although I have never met you, I know you are a deeply caring person. After all, you do own beagles. You absolutely need to take care of your own health and sanity. Therefore, I suggest that you explain to your nephew's wife that although you will no longer be able to watch the children every week, you would gladly pay for their enrollment in a day care facility. (JMHO)
Susan...partner of BeaglesRTherapy
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 · (Edited)
Thanks for the kind words . My package came in Friday , so I told her that I would watch the kids Monday , as long as they are not sick . She said that they weren’t when I was talking to her on the phone this morning while she was taking them skating , but I heard one of them coughing over the phone . If I get sick again this week , I am not going to do it again . I am old , but I can still touch the floor with my legs straight and do 20 pushups , but that is far from what I use to could do ,
 

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Thanks for the kind words . My package came in Friday , so I told her that I would watch the kids Monday , as long as they are not sick . She said that they weren’t when I was talking to her on the phone this morning while she was taking them skating , but I heard one of them coughing over the phone . If I get sick again this week , I am not going to do it again . I am old , but I can still touch the floor with my legs straight and do 20 pushups , but that is far from what I use to could do ,
Better doing pushups then pushing up daisy's, Marshall. Just saying. Keep doing those pushups. JMHO
 

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I don’t worry about those daisies , I know my best years are over . I would rather push up them daisies , self sufficient , than live past my physical or mental abilities .
Cherish these years Marshall, I am retired and cherishing my free time. Grand kids are coming the 4th of July, fishing, riding, driving the 4 wheelers, going out on the boat tubing, swimming and walking the sand bars, plus swimming in our pool. Lori and I are looking forward to it, Taylor will be home as well, she's the favorite aunt. Just saying. JMHO
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Her mom was emitted to the hospital yesterday with cyst on her kidneys , so I watched them again today . She said that she needed to take her mom some clothes . I left when my nephew got home . She calls me again today and asked me to keep them again tomorrow . She said that she needed to take her some more clothes because she is going to be there until the Sunday probably . I told her that I would be over there about 12:00 and she needs to realize that she can’t be there every day , or go when your husband gets home from work at night .
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
Foxy asked me in a post if I feel like she is taking advantage of me . I said no . But this morning I changed my mine . She text me this morning asking me instead of watching them 5 hours today so she could take her mom some more clothes , after just taking her clothes yesterday . She asked me if I could watch them all day so that she could go to work again Friday . I texted her back and said that I couldn’t watch them Friday . She just texted me back and said that her dad was going to watch them Friday and for me not to worry about coming today . I don’t think that she is being truthful with me and taking advantage of me and probably her dad now . I would bet $10 dollars that she is going to the hospital and sit with her mom all day and that is ok , if you don’t have other responsibilities that you are asking other people to take on .
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
My sister sent me a picture of them yesterday up in the hospital and in the bed with the grandma . I am surprised the hospital let them young kids in there . One of my other nephews just came down with Covid Wednesday . He went to work feeling bad and had to leave work early he got to feeling so bad . I wonder how many other people he spread it to .
 
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